BZ’s Berserk Bobcat Saloon Radio Show, 6.18.24 — a Tribute to Angus, My Rescue Dog

Our oldest rescue dog, Angus Cormac, passed away at 4:30 Sunday morning, June 16th, Father's Day. He was 13 years, 3 months, and two days old. 

He came to us as a rescue from Jackson, California, on Valentine's Day, February 14th, 2021. 

He was already 10 years old. We only had 3 years with him, just not enough time. 

He was raised as an "only dog" in a single Dog Mom household, where Mom was involved in a vehicle accident and passed away. Suddenly, everything in his life changed. He didn't know why. Her son didn't want Angus. We sure did. 

He was a holiday dog. We picked him up on Valentine's Day, and he passed today, on Father's Day. I was his first and only Papa Daddy. 

We exited Kalifornia and traveled to a Free State, where he had a nicer home, much bigger yard, surrounded by mountains he loved and lakes he explored. We tried very hard to provide him with his best dog life. 

He had lots of aliases, as dogs do, like Shadow, Shadow Unit, Godzilla Tail, and Dark Knight. We also called him Kindness, as he was so considerate with our other two rescue dogs. 

The perfect gentleman, he conducted himself with civility, acted with aplomb, dignity, and poise, enjoyed life to the fullest, and was loved with all our hearts. He was remarkably self-aware, very intelligent, circumspect, and understood quite a bit. His eyes revealed that.

 

It was only in the past week that he had an occasional cough, and then some labored breathing in the past three days. 

This morning at 2 AM, I was up, and noticed that he was restless, using his whole chest to try to breathe, his neck extended. I awakened my wife and we went to the vet ER. He passed an hour and a half later. 

It was so fast. Congestive heart failure. 

The folks at the vet ER were very compassionate. Angus was first placed in an oxygen kennel where he perked right up. We got to give him his final pet through a little portal, and he gave my wife his final dog kiss. He had oxygen and pain meds. But his heart was too weakened. 

And there's a hole in our hearts where our little boy used to be. 

We had no kids. 

He was our son.

Angus, my boy, at the door. Dad, welcome home!

Here is the show on Rumble. Start at 3:30. The only reason I did the show was to vent some adrenaline and anxiety.

 

I swear to all, I never in a thousand years thought that the passing of "just a dog" would affect me anything remotely like this. I hadn't seen this coming in the slightest.

Holding Angus Cormac after he had passed. What a beautiful, innocent soul. Perhaps this sounds strange, but I am glad I held him close.

I've anguished over the passing of Angus even more than my mother, 22 years ago. I don't know where this came from.

My wife holds our boy. He was Kindness. 

I'm heartbroken and absolutely perplexed, both at once. 

Was it his kindness, his awareness, his civility, his beautiful nature, his complete innocence in times of evil? 

I don't understand any of it. 

I haven't yet slept, I've been unwound, anxious, actually emotional. This is 100% not me. My wife has been outwardly much calmer than me, and slept the night. 

I'm at a loss in most every way. 

BZ